Monday, May 23, 2011

My near death experience

So I went into the hospital on Tuesday. Everything was ready to go but the hospital literally didn't have enough rooms. People were sleeping in the halls and we were one of them. I tried my best making it my own little nook, so that Kyle and I could get some rest. Then we heard word of a bed....

So we did the whole process, wiped down the room, got extra blankets and pillows, etc and it only took about 1 hour to get the antibiotics started; Vanco and Septra.

I have taken both of them before and the only side effect I had with Vanco was itchy, easily treated with Beny.

Well he set the course, hit start and I went straight to sleep from exhaustion from a long night in the ER. I slept pretty hard not to normal for me either. 2 and 1/2 hours later I woke up with this itchy, burning scalp! I have had similar symptoms to this with other antibiotics so I wasn't to concerned. Then within the next 10 min, everything came rushing down.

My hands were swelling fast, my fingers turned purple so they cut my rings off and hives all over my body. Then my throat began to swell. At this point I was freaking out but the people said your fine, just take a deep breath. Well I couldn't take a deep breath my throat was closing and making a very loud wheezing noise.

By this time people had flooded my room and I lost sight of Kyle, the doc in the room prescribed
epinephrine. They shot a dose into my IV it was one of the most horrible feelings ever, this incredible rush went up and down my body. My head began to feel has if it was being squeezed in a vice. The pain seemed to make me sick to my stomach and I then vomited.

After that, nothing, like I was sleeping and that is it. Then I became half aware, not alive but not dead, I could see streams of flashing lights passing by my face. I felt weightless, like I was in a shell, I knew what was happening wasn't right but I wasn't sure what was happening. Then my condition changed I was now able to hear and feel pain. I couldn't speak nor open my eyes, not even move.

When I heard someone say, "Ok, ready, get back." I knew I was just about to get shocked, in a way I was relieved because I knew they were working to get me out of this unusual state.
"1, 2, 3 clear," Immense pain shot through my chest, Kyle told me that when I came to I yelled out of pain. As soon as my eyes were open and I saw all the faces staring at me, I began to cry. When I started to cry the whole room seemed to let out a sigh of relief all at once.

My mind went into survival and blocked out most of my memory from that point on. I remember someone told me to hold still, and they cut my bra and shirt off to put in a central line.

I remember a nurse being rough when they lifted me up to move me and pulled out the central line! (I remember yelling at her.)

Then there was people trying to get a picc line in because the nurse ripped my central line out. I remember failed attempt after failed attempt. The man that was putting in or at least trying to put in the picc was using a ultra sound to see where the artery was. Then after he failed 5x he sent a lady to try, he took the ultra sound machine. I told her that she would need it she rudely said back,"I don't need that, if I can't get it, no one can." Well with that kind of statement she better get it on the first try! Guess what, she didn't get it the first time, nor the second time, nor the third try, at that point I said,"you are letting your pride get in the way of me getting the picc."

She got pissed, and said,"I am done," and stormed out of the room. Finally the man that tried before came back and got it, I could finally rest.

That was just the start of a very long recovery, I have had ups and down in this recovery, no one tells you how much havoc CPR/shocks cause your body.

I was fine for about the first 2 weeks but then anxiety consumed me, replays of that night would flash in my mind. Every little movement that might be different from my heart made me freak out thinking I was going to die.

This was the 2nd hardest thing in my life I have gone through, I don't really ever want to top the first.

My anxiety is much better now, taking it one day at a time, building up my strength, working very hard at getting back to where I was, but I am not there yet. That is where you come in, I need your prayers still and always, to help me recover, emotionally and physically. Love.


gsleader95 said...

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this. I'm very thankful you are here.

Nana said...

Our little Sweet Pea. . . . it scared us to read this, and it hurt us to know you went thru such a scary time. That nurse, that let her pride stand in her way of being a "real nurse" should be reprimanded, or put on permenant leave!You and Kyle are brave ones, for what you went thru. We pray that you never have to go thru this ever!! Gods hand was there, for a reason he let you go thru this, and we are positive, it will be for your strength and influence many. . . .Pop and I are with you in prayer, spirit, and love! you can't lose, there are so many that love and pray for you daily, hourly, and by the minute. A spitual hug from us, and a real hug, whenever we see you. Love you more than life. Pop and Nana

katie said...

So glad you are home and healing. Praying for your anxiety.

K-Kat said...

Looking for a new update kiddo. Where have you been?