Saturday, July 12, 2008

And still your love goes on -Phil Wickham

I am in the hospital, obviously my PFT didn't go well yesterday, they were lower than they were when I started the Septra. That being said, I am unable to continue my goal of a year out of the hospital.

I am sad, but surprisingly encouraged, my friend Guillermo taught on Thursday night and something that he said has been sticking with me.

He said something to this effect, that, " Abraham brought his son to the alter because he was willing to give up his son in order to be obedient to the Lord."

Even though this is hard to understand, even though this goes against everything in a Fathers body and will, he still gave his only son to be obedient.

This is what the Lord is asking of me, even though I have dreams and goals, even though I feel that my purpose and calling is to be a mother and a wife, I need to lay it on the alter.

As I go in the hospital time after time and as years go by with no hope in site God is asking me to be obedient to him where ever I am what ever I am doing in every area of life.

I am laying those things on the alter not that I will never recieve the desires of my heart but while those things have not come to pass I must lay them on the alter and obey.

Everyday and every time I get discouraged, every time I watch a romantic movie and and long for someone by my side, everytime I see a mother and child playing and laughing together, I must lay those desires on the alter, in that moment, in every reminder of my desire not yet fufilled I must lay it on the alter.

Lord give me strength to carry on, I need you, I love you, be with me.


Casey said...

I am so sorry you are in the hospital:( my heart goes out to you!
I love everything you said, it was so beautiful and so true. The Lord has so many other plans for our lives then this sickness, this is just a bridge we have to cross.
I love you!!

Rebecca said...

Thanks Hope, I love you so much girl, you are such an encouragement to me. I thank God that he allowed us to meet.

May grace and peace be with you. my lovely sister.